I heard about this blog-disaster letter going around. I didn't have an email, but I don't have ads on my page either. Just when I finally get into this whole blogging thing, everyone freaks out and considers shutting down their stuff. Hoping for the best.
Yesterday, Sir and I had a 'discussion' of sorts. He had a long day at work, and was very cranky all day. He texted me a few times saying he needed to change his attitude. I thought this would be a perfect opportunity for a little scening, and proceeded to dress a little skanky in a short skirt and revealing shirt. He got home and completely ignored it, which was odd because he loves when I wear skirts. I was hurt, because I immediately thought the worst: I had freaked him out with my new interest in D/s and he was shutting down. Or I was fat. So I got all pissy and cranky, which didn't add to his mood. After a long discussion, we determined that I just have really bad timing.
He is not creeped out or anything by the D/s stuff (score!). He was just exhausted and that was the last thing on his mind. I also realized that maybe I am so "fervent" (his words) about this stuff because I was sexually repressed for like my whole life. Now that something makes sense, is fun, and makes me feel good about myself, I want it all the time. At the start of our relationship, he was the one who wanted it all the time. I refused, taking baby steps into the normal teenage world of kissing and making out. Sir is my first and only sexual partner, for the record. I was so behind in learning 'the basics' of a relationship that the idea of anything more than kissing was almost panic-inducing. It was dirty, whorish, something to be guilty about. But I liked it. Did that mean that I was dirty and whorish?
This is a good segue into Day 11 of the 30 days of kink. The ethics of kink. As long as all parties are of age, sound mind, and want to be involved in the kink, I say go for it! Certain safety precautions should be taken, depending on how far into the kink the parties will go, but as long as everyone is cool with it, why not? If I want to be hung upside down and spanked while someone shoves their penis in my mouth, who has the right to tell me no? Not that I would enjoy that. Not at all. *shifty eyes*
Sir and I are both off tomorrow. We are currently working through a bottle of Pinot Grigio (which is much better than I thought it would be), and I am definitely hoping for some cuddling and maybe some spanking. I am trying to think of a way to ask him to spank me with something other than his hand. Like a paddle or something. He doesn't like to hurt me, which is sweet in general, but really irritating when we are in the moment and I really want him to smack my ass with something that will hurt. I'll let you know how it goes.
Always his,
HLA
Saturday, June 29, 2013
Friday, June 28, 2013
His Lady's Submissive Etiquette
These are informal as of right now, but I wanted to get them down on (blog)paper. Sir has not given me official rules, but there are certain things he prefers/dislikes me to do. There are also things that I want to do because I am working on improving myself for ME. I have not always taken good care of myself, and this is a way to lay it all out and hold myself accountable, which Sir likes.
To be updated as needed or more formalized in the future.
General:
To be updated as needed or more formalized in the future.
General:
- Try not to trash the kitchen while cooking. Sir cleans up after I cook (because he wants to) and I should make it easier for him. Clean as I go.
- No more F bombs. Even if I am by myself. (exception: use of a sexual nature)
- Do not be bitchy for no apparent reason. Do not take bitchiness out on Sir.
- Spend less time on electronic devices.
- Blog once a day (at least).
- Prep Sir's coffee each night before bed.
- Go to gym every day, unless closed or work schedule prevents it.
- Take vitamins every day.
- One snack allowed each day. (I have a problem with grazing. I also have hypothyroidism and trouble losing weight. I also really like food.)
- Add more vegetables and fruits to diet.
- Make an effort to vary the weekly menu.
- Weight loss goal: get my BMI to the outer edge of the healthy category. Lose 30 pounds of fat, as per the gym device that measures fat.
- Go through all weekly ads to find best prices on food for the week.
- Buy lunch out at work no more than once per week. PLAN AHEAD!
- Go through weekly coupons and remember to use them.
- Keep the checkbook updated.
- Remember to floss/use mouthwash.
- Shave/trim as needed.
- Wear skirts more often. Start at once a week.
- Get up with Sir on days I work and make us a good breakfast.
- Continue learning about D/s and be more open with Sir about what I want/think he would enjoy.
Thursday, June 27, 2013
Sir comes out to play...and more days of kink
So I've been focusing more on Sir's "man candy" lately. It makes him very happy, and then he makes me happy. Several times. Anyway. I was enjoying my Sir lollipop last night when he totally took charge and pinned me to the bed, played with my plugs, and wondered out loud what would happen if he came in my mouth and made me swallow it. *sub swoon* We ended up trying a new position and he didn't quite make it to my mouth in time, but the whole encounter was super exciting. He isn't usually that forceful, and I could tell he was greatly enjoying it. Which made me happy, because I love it when he takes control.
Onto the 30 days...
Day 6: Describe your weirdest/most interesting fantasy.
Hmmm. I can tell you it would involve nipple clamps (although I've never tried them, they are on my list of things to try), being tied up, possibly a flogger or a paddle of some kind (also on my must-try list), and basically being "kidnapped" for the weekend. For Sir to use me whenever he wants, focusing on whatever he wants me to do.
Day 7: Favorite toy?
Mine would probably be my good old vibrator. Sir likes to play with it and torture me everywhere. He also likes to give me a "threesome" with the vibrator.
Day 8: Kinky image I find erotic.
Simple but effective. Sir likes that style of nylons also.
Day 9: Kink related song/music video I enjoy.
Lace and Leather by Britney Spears. I can't really think of any others at this moment. That song makes me feel sexy though.
Day 10: Hard Limits
Scat play. Water sports. Needles. Fire play. An actual whip. Again, since I'm still getting my bearings, not sure what the options even are, let alone which ones I would never do. I feel like I would be open to anything that doesn't leave a gaping, open wound.
******
Sir and I were talking about my blog last night and cleared some things up. He understands the urges but didn't understand why it came on so fast. Well, I'm an impatient person, for one. Everything I do is fast. Also, as I explained to him, it was like I had a halleluia moment and finally figured out a huge part of my personality, especially as it relates to us as a couple. Everything started to click, like a giant sun illuminated my sex life. A bit dramatic, but there you go. As though the goddess Aurora had brought my dawn. Sorry. Melodrama.
So he gets it, understands it, and seems to really enjoy it, judging from last night. I feel like our relationship has always been this way, unofficially. It feels good to have a name for it.
Always His,
HLA
Onto the 30 days...
Day 6: Describe your weirdest/most interesting fantasy.
Hmmm. I can tell you it would involve nipple clamps (although I've never tried them, they are on my list of things to try), being tied up, possibly a flogger or a paddle of some kind (also on my must-try list), and basically being "kidnapped" for the weekend. For Sir to use me whenever he wants, focusing on whatever he wants me to do.
Day 7: Favorite toy?
Mine would probably be my good old vibrator. Sir likes to play with it and torture me everywhere. He also likes to give me a "threesome" with the vibrator.
Day 8: Kinky image I find erotic.
Simple but effective. Sir likes that style of nylons also.
Day 9: Kink related song/music video I enjoy.
Lace and Leather by Britney Spears. I can't really think of any others at this moment. That song makes me feel sexy though.
Day 10: Hard Limits
Scat play. Water sports. Needles. Fire play. An actual whip. Again, since I'm still getting my bearings, not sure what the options even are, let alone which ones I would never do. I feel like I would be open to anything that doesn't leave a gaping, open wound.
******
Sir and I were talking about my blog last night and cleared some things up. He understands the urges but didn't understand why it came on so fast. Well, I'm an impatient person, for one. Everything I do is fast. Also, as I explained to him, it was like I had a halleluia moment and finally figured out a huge part of my personality, especially as it relates to us as a couple. Everything started to click, like a giant sun illuminated my sex life. A bit dramatic, but there you go. As though the goddess Aurora had brought my dawn. Sorry. Melodrama.
So he gets it, understands it, and seems to really enjoy it, judging from last night. I feel like our relationship has always been this way, unofficially. It feels good to have a name for it.
Always His,
HLA
Wednesday, June 26, 2013
30 Days of Kink--only faster!
After seeing several other blogs doing this, I figured it might be a good way to guide the babbling and help me focus. This blog is a huge step outside my comfort zone, and answering questions feels easier than volunteering the info on my own. Here are the first couple questions from 30 DOK and my answers.
Day 1: In a nutshell, define your kinky self. D/s? What appeals to you?
I consider myself the submissive partner in my marriage. I enjoy making him happy, whether it is by prepping the coffee maker for him the night before so he has fresh coffee in the mornings, by making his lunch (when I get up with him, something I need to work on), by keeping the house cleaned up. The idea of being "controlled" in my daily life is not something I am comfortable with, until I think about the idea that both of us controls the other already. I try to limit my use of a certain F word because he thinks it is beneath me (outside the bedroom, of course). He cleans up the kitchen if I don't get to it (and I often don't), in exchange for me making dinner every night. I think he secretly likes it when he asks me to make his coffee and I immediately get up and get it ready. It is a way for me to show him how much I love him, especially when I behave otherwise. I have kind of a temper.
Day 2: List your kinks.
I like being dominated (convenient, right?) in the bedroom. Spankings are excellent. I think I enjoy pain, so I guess that would be masochism? I am very new to the idea of speaking about sex openly, so this category will probably grow as I learn more about BDSM. I do like vibrators and butt plugs. Can you see me blushing right now? Probably for the best. Just added restraints after answering number 4.
Day 3: How did you discover that you were kinky?
I never knew that there was a word for my particular cup of tea until I read Fifty Shades. Several of my close co-workers were talking about it and one of them offered to lend me her copy. Halfway through the first book, I returned the borrowed copy and bought all three titles. Something sparked in me, blazing through the terrible writing and weak storyline of the books. The idea of serving someone I loved, serving in every way, was very attractive. I am a very selfish person sometimes, and I would like to work on not being so selfish, especially in terms of my relationship with my Sir Charming.
Day 4: Any experiences that foreshadow your kink?
My sexual history is rather short. I have been with exactly one person, and sex was never brought up in my house. I never had The Talk about sex, periods, etc. Unless you count the one that they do in school. Which I don't, because no one is really paying attention anyway. Anytime I had feelings that remotely fell into the sexual category, the general aura of my homelife made me feel like they were something bad, something to feel guilty about. During high school, I finally figured out that these feelings were normal. Once I realized that, I started to notice that I really liked certain things I saw in movies or read about in books. I liked the rough, passionate scenes, liked the idea of the bad boy, liked the idea of being handcuffed. So add restraints to number 2. Check.
Day 5: Your first kinky sexual experience.
I'm going with the first one that Sir Charming and I were both aware was kinky. This was about a month ago. I told you I was new. I came home from work, and was presented with a chilled shot since I had been bitching all day via text about how horrid my day was. After he handed me the shot, he told me to drink it. In a very Sir-like tone. Which made me very interested. I have been dropping hints left and right for months about all this kinky and/or D/s stuff and he seems a little creeped out by it. Maybe its because I'm so interested in it. Anyway, he then ordered me to the bedroom, where he told me to go into the bathroom and undress. I came out, and he was in silk boxers, armed with a necktie. He tied up my wrists and proceeded to...ahem...detain me, for the next 20 minutes. It was glorious.
I'm hoping maybe this blog will let me process this kind of stuff outside of talking about it with Sir Charming quite so much. He is still very vanilla, and I don't want to scare him off. :) That would make me a very sad Lady Aurora.
Ever his,
HLA
Day 1: In a nutshell, define your kinky self. D/s? What appeals to you?
I consider myself the submissive partner in my marriage. I enjoy making him happy, whether it is by prepping the coffee maker for him the night before so he has fresh coffee in the mornings, by making his lunch (when I get up with him, something I need to work on), by keeping the house cleaned up. The idea of being "controlled" in my daily life is not something I am comfortable with, until I think about the idea that both of us controls the other already. I try to limit my use of a certain F word because he thinks it is beneath me (outside the bedroom, of course). He cleans up the kitchen if I don't get to it (and I often don't), in exchange for me making dinner every night. I think he secretly likes it when he asks me to make his coffee and I immediately get up and get it ready. It is a way for me to show him how much I love him, especially when I behave otherwise. I have kind of a temper.
Day 2: List your kinks.
I like being dominated (convenient, right?) in the bedroom. Spankings are excellent. I think I enjoy pain, so I guess that would be masochism? I am very new to the idea of speaking about sex openly, so this category will probably grow as I learn more about BDSM. I do like vibrators and butt plugs. Can you see me blushing right now? Probably for the best. Just added restraints after answering number 4.
Day 3: How did you discover that you were kinky?
I never knew that there was a word for my particular cup of tea until I read Fifty Shades. Several of my close co-workers were talking about it and one of them offered to lend me her copy. Halfway through the first book, I returned the borrowed copy and bought all three titles. Something sparked in me, blazing through the terrible writing and weak storyline of the books. The idea of serving someone I loved, serving in every way, was very attractive. I am a very selfish person sometimes, and I would like to work on not being so selfish, especially in terms of my relationship with my Sir Charming.
Day 4: Any experiences that foreshadow your kink?
My sexual history is rather short. I have been with exactly one person, and sex was never brought up in my house. I never had The Talk about sex, periods, etc. Unless you count the one that they do in school. Which I don't, because no one is really paying attention anyway. Anytime I had feelings that remotely fell into the sexual category, the general aura of my homelife made me feel like they were something bad, something to feel guilty about. During high school, I finally figured out that these feelings were normal. Once I realized that, I started to notice that I really liked certain things I saw in movies or read about in books. I liked the rough, passionate scenes, liked the idea of the bad boy, liked the idea of being handcuffed. So add restraints to number 2. Check.
Day 5: Your first kinky sexual experience.
I'm going with the first one that Sir Charming and I were both aware was kinky. This was about a month ago. I told you I was new. I came home from work, and was presented with a chilled shot since I had been bitching all day via text about how horrid my day was. After he handed me the shot, he told me to drink it. In a very Sir-like tone. Which made me very interested. I have been dropping hints left and right for months about all this kinky and/or D/s stuff and he seems a little creeped out by it. Maybe its because I'm so interested in it. Anyway, he then ordered me to the bedroom, where he told me to go into the bathroom and undress. I came out, and he was in silk boxers, armed with a necktie. He tied up my wrists and proceeded to...ahem...detain me, for the next 20 minutes. It was glorious.
I'm hoping maybe this blog will let me process this kind of stuff outside of talking about it with Sir Charming quite so much. He is still very vanilla, and I don't want to scare him off. :) That would make me a very sad Lady Aurora.
Ever his,
HLA
Tuesday, June 25, 2013
Breaking the ice...
I'm a twenty-something woman in the process of figuring out what life has in store for me. I need a relatively anonymous place in which to do this, so I created this blog as a place to order my thoughts. Original, right?
Ten Things About Aurora
1. I hate my job. It feels so good to be able to say that without wondering if someone will tattle on me.
2. Sleeping Beauty is my favorite Disney princess.
3. I also like the literary aspect of Aurora, Goddess of the Dawn, as my nom de plume for this blog of discovery and renewal.
4. If I can manage to get over my prudishness, I will hopefully be able to share the catalyst for this blog, which was discovering a passion for BDSM and submission. I hesitate to call myself a full submissive, but I am taking baby steps deeper into the wider BDSM/kink world.
5. I am married to my Prince Charming.
6. I am a sucker for romantic comedies.
7. As much as the Fifty Shades series has been disliked on the many Dominant/submissive pages I have perused, they changed my life.
8. For the past several months, I have been increasingly intrigued by the idea of D/s.
9. This blog will likely contain adult themes, in case you missed numbers 4,7, and 8.
10. I hope to outline my development as a submissive here.
I am a pretty private person, but I was so excited to see that there are other people out there who share the same likes and dislikes with regards to sexual behaviors. It takes so much courage to put all that out there for the world to see, even though they can't see YOU. So thanks, BDSM bloggers.
His Lady Aurora
Ten Things About Aurora
1. I hate my job. It feels so good to be able to say that without wondering if someone will tattle on me.
2. Sleeping Beauty is my favorite Disney princess.
3. I also like the literary aspect of Aurora, Goddess of the Dawn, as my nom de plume for this blog of discovery and renewal.
4. If I can manage to get over my prudishness, I will hopefully be able to share the catalyst for this blog, which was discovering a passion for BDSM and submission. I hesitate to call myself a full submissive, but I am taking baby steps deeper into the wider BDSM/kink world.
5. I am married to my Prince Charming.
6. I am a sucker for romantic comedies.
7. As much as the Fifty Shades series has been disliked on the many Dominant/submissive pages I have perused, they changed my life.
8. For the past several months, I have been increasingly intrigued by the idea of D/s.
9. This blog will likely contain adult themes, in case you missed numbers 4,7, and 8.
10. I hope to outline my development as a submissive here.
I am a pretty private person, but I was so excited to see that there are other people out there who share the same likes and dislikes with regards to sexual behaviors. It takes so much courage to put all that out there for the world to see, even though they can't see YOU. So thanks, BDSM bloggers.
His Lady Aurora
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